Recently, we asked Joan Borysenko, a world-renown expert in mind/body connection, to share her wisdom about how to connect with what’s important and live a happier, more fulfilled life. Here’s what she had to say. We hope it inspires you.

My son Justin is all grown up now, but I still remember his fourth birthday as if it were yesterday. What made it so memorable? It wasn’t the part when the six tiny party guests scattered, as if on cue, all through the Boston aquarium. It wasn’t even the moment of relief when they were finally all rounded up. Looking back, it was the delight that bubbled over when a child was inspecting a big purple starfish or staring wide eyed at an octopus gliding by. A beautiful new world was opening up for them, and I got to witness it. How great is that?

What fills you up, and have you made it a priority in your life? That’s the real key to happiness. Not sure you know the answer? Here’s a clue. Your most treasured memories hold the key to fulfillment and living with purpose and joy. One of my friend Betsy’s fondest memories is a weeklong camping trip to Martha’s Vineyard when she was ten. When she talks about it you can practically smell the pungent smoke of the campfire, feel the breeze, and hear the ocean waves in the distance. As an adult, the camping trips she takes with her family as often as possible are a strong priority. They are like a release valve for the stress of daily living. Out in nature, physically active, and free from the usual daily routines, Betsy feels balanced and happy. She returns rejuvenated and ready to give her best at home and at work.

Connect your memories with your feelings

Here’s a way to let your memories guide you in setting priorities that support your best self. Sit down with a trusted friend or spouse and take turns sharing your most treasured memories. It’s important to find a time and place where you can relax without being disturbed. You’ll have a lot of fun and some great laughs, but prepare to experience some deeper emotions too. You may be surprised at what comes to the surface.

After each memory is shared, take a moment together to reflect on what made it special. During the process, your friend might even observe that your face and expressions reveal more than you realize. For example, when you recall a memory you might look delighted, but sound wistful, too. These are all clues. Ask yourself what you really miss. Are your feelings powerful enough to make you want to sign up for a class, join a club, volunteer or find some other way to recreate the feeling? Spending a few hours a week on a special hobby could be all that it takes to reconnect you to joy.

We naturally reminisce as each year passes, and that paves the way for passing on what is precious. Rachel, a forty-something school counselor, went to a family reunion. She and her brothers reminisced about what a good horsewoman she'd been in high school and college. Rachel dusted off her helmet, leased a horse, and signed up for dressage lessons. When she discovered that friends at her barn volunteered at a therapeutic riding center, she joined them. Helping kids was always her passion, but by reclaiming a treasured memory she was able to give new hope to emotionally challenged and physically disabled youngsters. That makes her feel more energized and vibrant than ever. What makes you feel most alive and happy? Let that be your guide for creating your best life ever in 2009!

Steps for connecting memories to your best life

1. Sit with a friend and share three treasured memories each.
2. Reflect together on what felt most “alive” and compelling in the sharing. Be specific. For example: Was it the joy of witnessing children discovering the world, the invigorating feeling of being outdoors, or the energy that comes from giving hope to people in need?
3. Identify an activity that you can do now that will create the desired feeling. For example, take children on a field trip, plan a camping trip, or volunteer to work with the disabled.
4. Make the activity a priority. That means putting it on your calendar and, when the time comes, doing it!
5. Let each other know when you’ve followed through on your new priority. Even an empty email with the simple words “I did it!” in the subject line is great motivation to continue. Then, as you begin to reap the benefits of the gift your memory has given you, find time to share the treasure with your friend.

Dr. Joan Borysenko has been called The First Lady of Mind/Body Medicine. She is a Harvard trained biologist, as well as a licensed psychologist and spiritual educator. One of the most popular national speakers on health and wellness, Joan is the bestselling author of over a dozen books, the writer and star of her own PBS special, Inner Peace for Busy People, a blogger for the Huffington Post, and host of an Internet radio show.